Whos religious?

On the Bible -


Every story in the old testament from genesis, to adam and eve, noah and the ark etc etc. all came from The Epic of Gilgamesh. A Sumerian tale written about 3500 years before the old testament.

 

I dnt know her. I have not seen her. Thats where i have got most of the girls in my avy is from craigslist.

 

You (TA) should check out the Gospel of Thomas:


http://www.gnosis.org/naghamm/nhl_thomas.htm


A glimpse of the JC that the majority of folks that call themselves Christian don't seem to see. I think you'll like this one.

 

If I had to pick a religion... I think I'd go with the Church of the F Spaghetti Monster.

 

Yeah the 90's in Norway were a bit mad. Buring churchs down and making necklaces out of band members skulls. All a little crazy. Not for me, i think a lot of the black metal groups need sectioning.


I went to see Mayhem in London about 10 year ago. We were given a rusty razor blade with Mayhem written on it on the way in. That was one moss pit i was getting into!!!!!!


The gig only lasted 40 minutes before the signer stab himself in the arm and hit an artery. Squirt, collapse lol.

 

That looks like a slug with matballs stuffed in its cheeks!

 

Mayhem has to be one of the craziest death metal bands ever! Like the necklaces out of the singers skull bones after he killed himself is nuts, and they used the scene as the cover art for the up coming album. Kind of twisted! Kinda funny how he left a note saying "excuse all the blood". Those are some crazy fucks though singer killing himself and bass play murdering one of the original guitarists and shit most of the damn singers they've had are dead now.


If you have a weak stomach scroll down!!! past this

 

AP your no different then many who search for a reason or want to to why, when, how or where will I go when I die? As for rotting in the ground....well the answer is you become a tree, a plant, a flower, moss, grass and maybe some kick ass strain of mj. No one knows what happens for the dead have not come back to give us a after death report or documentary on what will happen.


As for the soul living on.....I think it does but in a different form. One may come back as another living creature, plant or for me>>hopefully something swimming in the ocean if I can ever get permission to be buried at sea. Even then we are just the nutrients to feed the next living thing. Our soul to me is how we treat others everyday or how hard we love those dear to us, having compassion and heart to care about other people and not be selfish. So my frd, why do we need a church to give us answers that lie within us? Think about religion and I mean every one of them, it is all about money, control, brainwashing at its finest and they prey on people who go through life looking for an answer when it comes from within YOU. No religion, church can give you character, personality, charisma, love, hope, a home or anything unless you want it and do it for yourself. Sure ppl feel fuzzy or maybe get self esteem and hope from the people who root you on, but really you can do that on your own if you believe in yourself.


I just frown and run from anything organized because if you look closely at most religions and cults they have one thing in common. They want YOU and want you to conform to their beliefs, want your money, ask you to recruit others and all that adds up to what? I am sure your intelligent enough to figure it out.


I respect anyone who believes in religion but just do not push it on me is all I ask. If there is a god, well no I do not think his name is Jesus nor do I believe in Satan. What I do think is there is positive and negative energies all around us.....just like storm cells form. We can choose where our life takes us and treat others as you wish to be treated. If your kind, loyal, have respect, do not cheat and try to be the best you can in life then your headed in the right direction.


Science has proven all this "hocus pocus" stuff that so many religions shove down your throat to be wrong. All the books written and various bibles that each one teaches were silly when you truly sit down and read some of these stories they actually want us to believe. I am not poking fun so sorry to offend but it is so far fetched and like a fairy tale or fantasy. For example.......women can NOT get pregnant unless they have sex. Immaculate conception?? I can not for the life of me understand how other people do think she was a virgin and then wham.....prego?? Adam and Eve?? Another crazy story....ohhh so he created them, prayed they would be good and not have sex because why? If he gave them sexual organs, ummmm why would he give them "add on perks" if he wanted them to behave and not be naughty. Plus they are related so now you have incest on top of children being born which one kills the other? Has that "Flowers in the Attic" (book) creepy whacked out chill to it eh? They too were all alone in an attic so yah once they hit puberty....sissy and brother slept together after many years locked in an attic..lol So back to topic....he makes Adam, takes a rib as he sleeps to make Eve, hopes she does not eat the forbidden fruit aka the one eyed snake....she does and now we all are fucked because of it? Ohh yes that is correct, he was testing them! OK for what? He wanted to test them like rats in a lab? So then tell me if he is the loving man everyone adores, sounds quite perverted or sadistic in the sense why put two raging hormonal naked people of the opposite sex in a garden alone with only animals?? Also we are all supposed to be paying for their naughty act because why?? I thought he was forgiving?? Least that is what we are always told in church. One more tidbit that amazes me is dinosaurs lived long long before Adam and Eve according to all the dates unless someone got that wrong and maybe they lived with the dinosaurs? Now the church will say NO we did not come from apes, nor did dinosaurs roam the earth even tho there is concrete proof with bones and other artifacts.


Anywhos....I am sorry to mock or poke fun but this is just a couple of MANY reason's I do not buy into the whole JC and bible. My scientific and logical mind would need a better story then that one ...hell aliens seem more logical because there are OTHER planets. Certainly we can not be so smug to think we are the only life in this universe or other's?


Ok.....prolly should end this for everyone has a right to believe in whatever makes them happy. That is what it really boils down to and if ppl get hope or faith to do something positive for their family and their own life, then hey whether it is bogus or not, it did something good. Maybe it is there to build self esteem and give them courage to move forward. All I was saying is you can do that on your own if you set your mind to it. The brain is amazing and I do think when ppl think god healed them from an illness, what really happened is they tapped into that part they never used in the brain which was stimulated by all the positive energy people gave them to believe in something. Next thing you know....happy thoughts occurred and the brain responded to fix the error or issue.

 

...just like to add that I would never kill every person that is ever born because one person was tempted to do something wrong (i.e. eat the forbidden fruit), and I would never follow someone who would.


Plus, plants and animals die too, they didn't eat shit!


edit: oh... i see mermaid covered that too lol

 

LOL DaBurner....well technically they kinda did eat shit if a plant gets nutrients from something living who took a dump on them...hahha Hey maybe they were punished for eating shit and the animals ate the forbidden fruit as bet they were bump bump bumping in the night too!


but it is funny when you try to digest this silly tale IMO.


Anywhos .....DaBurner you were right bro when you posted you would never follow anyone who killed a person for being tempted. Not so forgiving or loving if you ask me.


Hey maybe we are a lab experiment that the aliens are performing on us to study and learn from our behaviors ....never know right? For all we know, we are in some mock set up to look like a planet but in reality we are only living in a lab.....


We could be their little pets or rodents and when it gets dark, well it is just because they turned off the lights

 

lol, so i'm guessing Eve ate the fruit and later took a shit of it. The shit fed the surrounding plants. The herbivores ate the plants. The carnivores ate the herbivores. The insects ate those plants and animals. The birds ate the insects. The fish ate the bird shit as they flew overhead letting it rip, I guess that's how we all got fucked.


...then we get picked up with tweezers by an alien in the lab, get dropped back in our homemade ecosystem and try to convince others we've been abducted by aliens.

 

LOL @ DaBurner...haha cracking up as this is funny shit!


Hey we could make a book of our stoner thoughts .....best seller Sci-Fi/comedy eh?


Ok.....so after all that went down in the Garden of Eden.


Next thing you know we have this virgin chick "Mary" who thinks she became preggo by God by immaculate conception when actually the aliens used "in vitro" on her wall flower ass. Then they decided hmmmm lets get all the people stoned on acid and see how they react to her being prego and no man has had sex with her. So they fall for it, hook line and sinker because they are all stoned. Well then next thing yanno these three wise men show up at a fake stable they tossed into the homemade ecosystem after she walks across the manmade dessert to only be walking in circles in a fish tank. They offer her gifts, everyone celebrates the birth and the party gets even MORE intense. More drugs for everyone and all kinds of props being tossed into the tank.


Later on we have moses floating down the river in a basket, Jesus is hung from a cross and then they can not find his body in the tomb. Ohh and when they hung him, they were just tripping out on acid combined with lots of booze, crack and magic shrooms. They really did not know they were killing him and when they saw him dead they were like "fuck" .....boy did that sober their asses up. Oh so they hide his body so no one knows and when they look for it later....poooof it is gone!!! After the trauma of killing their buddy, losing his body, they do MORE drugs to only have a crzy trip again and think he rose from the dead.


Then you have on the other side Moses who is also God's right arm or left as JC and him both are trying to be the VP......well he gets so angry that others want to kill his buddies he pulls off a magical stunt and parts the RED SEA....hmmm let's see JC top that trick he thinks to himself And he has his stoner sheep following his ass as well.....well because they are REALLY the drug lords since the Aliens figured himmmm lets pit them against one another and see who wins in this fake contest to be GOD.


Now the aliens are not stupid, they know everyone will come down off the drugs so they have to think of something else to convince their experimental humans/ratties that this is all really happening. They toss in a book at some point so that the next generation will believe this all really happened .....a bedtime story if you will and survey each specimen(human) to see will they believe it. Of course they added in all kind of fillers to this bible and even had a man called Noah with an ark who took animals 2 by 2......trippy shit but amazingly the drugs and all the trippin they did helped it to be a success. Now they know the natives are getting restless and when they started to protest against drugs, that threw a monkey wrench into their testing groups. So they then had to come up with diseases, give them weapons to fight it out among one another, other drugs for depression and created these other beings called doctor's who would tell them they needed it to treat an illness so now we have some still hooked on the hard core shit, some pill poppers and then the ones who question who is god or I do not buy this bible story as ppl like me.


Who knows what the next chapter will be, will they kill us off or let us live?

 

They may just burn us in the tank then build another ecosystem on top of the ashes like they did the dinosaurs.


.... wait a minute, since we are made by the aliens in their labs, are they our god? Lets start a religion that would last thousands of years, we'll write a book full of our stories and make believers from people which would spread down to their children and so forth, we'll call the religion alenlabism.

 

Alienlabism.......me likes!


Now let's get some follower's and start a temple where we offer gifts to them in exchange for letting us live.


They may like skuzz......we could offer him?


Unless you can think of another worthy human they may like to play with?


Would have to be someone interesting and a worthy specimen for them to do as they wish to them. Hell he may like it, maybe he could hook up with a crack ho alien chick with large breasts!


Of course there is the hairy yeti, AP who could help assist them write more books and persuade the masses to believe in them? Maybe they would rather have Snick? You can hold a secret voting ballot for all members to choose who should be sacrificed and everyone vote.


Hate to offer our females but Geo has large breasts so we could bribe them by showing them pics?? sis....it is for mankind. Besides you could sweet talk them or cook them a nice meal so they are kind to you.


Then again it could go by senority, pick the lowest on the totem pole.....last one who joined the site will be who we offer.